But I still have 94 monkeys to go

Sometimes, you just can’t fight things. As a Brooklyn resident I endorse the NYRR’s attempt to give the Brooklyn Half Marathon its own hipster branding. I didn’t run Brooklyn before it was cool, but at least I can do it now.

Also, the race is opening some new spots April 10 if you want to be awesome and eat soft pretzels on the beach with me (with a small jog beforehand).

Step 1: Open up “Track My Runners” application for the NYC Marathon to try and figure it out for family and friends.

Step 2: Panic when you don’t find yourself by name in there. Panic a LOT.

Step 3: Dig up bib number (#65397) from one of the 800,000 marathon-related emails you have now saved, like some kind of digital hoarder.

Step 4: Meet last year’s owner of your bib number, fantasize about alternate life in which you are a 62 year old man from Milan (who totally negative split this shit, so nice job, Roberto).

newyorker:

Ed Koren has crossed the finish line of the New York City Marathon three times, an accomplishment that provided the inspiration for this week’s cover, “On Your Mark!” But how about his furry creatures? What was the inspiration for them? “During the late nineteen-sixties and early seventies, an avalanche of hirsutism and fuzziness took over the nation,” Koren told us. “Long hair, wild hairdos, exuberant facial appendages were everywhere as expressions of social rebellion, political revolt, and a general questioning of everything established.”

The mile markers are a bit off, but here’s most of my route from yesterday’s 20-miler. And this post is about 20 miles long in pixels.

I designed this route to follow parts of the marathon course that I hadn’t been exposed to yet (at miles ~10-17, then 18-20 on the map) and to get a lot of bridges in (there were 4). When I was back in Manhattan after 15 I picked up veggielife and we finished off the last 4-and-some miles. It was such a relief to turn into the park after the stop-and-go lights on First Ave. which I think hurt my leg more than a steady, slow pace would have.

I know I was thinking about something important, but (and I never thought I’d write this) most of those early miles were a blur. At one point I was passed by a guy with wool socks on his hands (like me, he must have been surprised by the “Feels like 32” temperatures that morning). I saw a film shoot setting up in Williamsburg, but no stars — apparently Robert DeNiro was around though? Mostly, I saw other runners and imagined they were all going to join me at Fort Wadsworth.

I made a few mistakes I’m hoping not to make on M-Day, but none of them were torpedo-ing. I forgot my knee strap, which definitely made a difference after Mile 11 or so. I also made an emergency bathroom stop around 11, which could happen on race day and if so, no big deal. (My mom asked me the other day if there are bathrooms on the marathon course. No mom, if you have to go, you get disqualified… the way we do here in the big city.)

Something that probably won’t happen on Marathon Day: I got lost 3 separate times — in Brooklyn before mile 4 (trying to avoid the Rock’n’Roll 10K crowds, no offense), in Chinatown looking for the Williamsburg Bridge entrance and in Long Island City looking for the Queensboro Bridge entrance. When I said I wanted to practice bridges, that is NOT WHAT I MEANT. There were a lot of traffic crossings and squinting ahead at street signs, through which I kept my watch running and watched it with concern.

The last time was fairly demoralizing because I was despairing of getting to our rendezvous point on time, and I knew that when I found the Queensboro Bridge I would then have to RUN it, so relief was some distance away. Ironically, it was then — at my lowest point — I realized I will do another marathon someday. I can’t explain it, it was just a feeling. Don’t tell everyone who already thinks I’m crazy, OK?

At long last, here we are at taper. So soon, marathon! So soon!